Saturday, November 25, 2017

What Did You Say?

March 10, 2015 by · Leave a Comment 

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Boaters are a sociable bunch, but when people get together, there’s always a chance that someone will say something that’s better left unsaid. Seven boaters shared their “Whoops!” “Oops!” or “Oh, no, you didn’t!” stories; some will make you laugh in gratitude that these gaffes didn’t come your way, others may remind you of something that happened on your boat, and at least one account should incense you. We’ve identified the tale-tellers exactly as they requested (truth be told, at least one boater requested a name change before agreeing to share an awkward account).

Liz: The raft-up got a bit bigger than we anticipated. Friends of friends and all that! So anyway, I’m in our cabin, nursing my son, when a strange man walks in and says, “I’m just going to use your head.” I screamed, “Get out!” and he did, after saying real sarcastically, “Overreact much?”

Sunny: I don’t like tight clothes anytime, but especially in summer, so I wear loose stuff. I was so humiliated, though, when we went to a restaurant for dinner and another boat owner came to help us tie up. As I went to say, “Thanks, we got this,” he yelled to someone, “Little help here, Joe! We got a mom-to-be who’s hungry for dinner!”

J: The moment I tossed over the anchor, I remembered I hadn’t got around to securing the other end. I cursed so much my kids learned new words! Now I always double check (and carry a spare), but my wife never lets me forget it.

Nate: Our grandson has a peanut allergy, so we tell all our guests not to bring any food when they join us. The boy my granddaughter was dating, who apparently only likes PB & J sandwiches, kept complaining that he was hungry all during lunch. I ignored him until he said to my grandson, “How does it feel that you get to ruin everybody’s day?”

Paula: My husband’s friend’s new girlfriend wore a pair of shorty-shorts on the boat (the denim was almost skin-thin). Then she complained that all the other guests on the boat that day made her feel “uncomfortable.”

BV: I bought enough beer for everyone onboard (except the captain and me) to have two. I think that’s enough! My cousin comes up to me, puts his arm around me, and in a real fake voice of concern, says, “Is business bad? Is that why you’re so cheap with the brews?”

Adriana: After a fun day of boating, I grabbed the pole so I could do my job and grab the mooring. As I reached out, my halter top fell down. I wasn’t wearing a bra or a swimsuit, so I pulled up the top and dropped the pole over the side. My boyfriend (now husband) didn’t see me topless, but he did see the pole go over, so he yelled, “You boob!” (This story is funny to everyone but me. The couples with us that day keep talking about it though it happened 22 years ago.)

By Lita Smith-Mines
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Jay Remer, a personal, business, and wedding etiquette consultant and writer, (www.etiquetteguy.com) offers our readers his perspective on how boaters on the receiving end of these poorly uttered words should look at each situation.

For Liz: Intrusions into one’s private space can be startling, especially when nursing a baby. (I imagine you will consider locking the door next time.) This poor intruder may have been as shocked as you were and hence his defensive retort. He was in the wrong, but I doubt an apology will be forthcoming; it was likely he had no intention of embarrassing anyone.

For Sunny: Remember to always take the high road and ignore such comments (silently flipping him the bird might get the message across most effectively if you feel the urge).

For J: Sounds like a great moment for a good belly laugh, unless this is becoming a habit! However, swearing in front of your children is definitely inappropriate in this case (we all say things we regret). Have a chat with them, explaining your unreasonable outburst and stressing how obviously senseless it was. They need to learn this is verboten or they may think the swearing is humorous.

For Nate: No one of dating age should live on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. As host, you can explain that your boat is nut-free because of serious health reasons, and your boat must definitely be bully-free as well.

For Paula: We have no control over how other people are going to feel; this is really their sole domain. If she felt uncomfortable being inappropriately dressed, maybe she won’t make the mistake again (if she does, it sounds to me like he needs a new girlfriend).
For BV: This sort of social ineptitude is unacceptable. I think the answer should be. “Two for each person is enough!” Then edit him out of future guest lists.

For Adriana: One needs to develop the ability to laugh at one’s self. I doubt your friends are laughing at you, but rather at the comedic quality of what happened. Double-entendres often are humorous; lighten your load” and let it go!

Read Jay Remer’s blog here: http://todaysetiquette.blogspot.com/

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